Yesterday I spoke of "alchemy" and employing it so don't we become nihilistic. Here is an example of what I meant.
When love beckons to you, follow him,
Though his ways are hard and steep.
And when his wings enfold you yield to him,
Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you.
And when he speaks to you believe in him,
Though his voice may shatter your dreams as the north
wind lays waste your garden.
For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you.
~Kahlil Gibran The Prophet
To insist on a predetermined outcome lies outside our province. So we develop abilities to meet, react and integrate our experiences. We learn to say yes knowing all the while it may mean heartbreak. We say yes to our inherent right to say no---I don't wish to participate, despite appearing uncharitable or anti-social. We say yes to our heart, our instinct, our intuition, our dream. We say yes to Life on its terms. We say yes to loving ourselves so that our love for others becomes authentic. We say yes to honoring ourselves so that we understand what it means to respect others. We say yes to honesty because we've experienced the pain and confusion of being lied to. We say yes to being gentle because we have learned clarity through patience with our errant self. We say yes so that we are transformed from what we are to what we wish to be.