Well, thanks so very much Pat. If, as you suggest, the Old Testament is untrustworthy, that nullifies the New Testament as well. What is there left to believe in?
The simplest answer I have is, you. The belief that God will interact with you on a personal level. That your current understanding of God is so restrictive it renders the concept meaningless--other than the level of fear utilized (punishment for all eternity; hell) to keep you from running amok.
The harder answer is, understanding complexity. I am going to try and provide an example. Lets look at the possibility of arranging three numbers, 1-2-3. (to make it easier, I am going to use the letters in my name; P-A-T) There are six possible combinations. (123 pat--231 atp--312 tpa--321 tap--213 apt--132 pta) But if I were to use seven numbers, 1-2-3-4-5-6-7 (my full name, P-A-T-R-I-C-K) how many combinations would there be? You probably don't know and most likely don't have any idea how to figure it out. But if I provided you a formula, you could arrive at the answer quickly. (Solution: 1 x 2 x 3 = 6; 1 x 2 x 3 x 4 x 5 x 6 x 7 = 5040) There are 5040 different combinations to arranging 7 numbers or (in this case) letters. Going from the combinations of the word PAT to PATRICK, is like going from the Bible to a true understanding of God. There is an exponential aspect to comprehending the Deity.
That said, I have provided a formula to simplify the complexities involved. (Gift--Gratitude--God) But the formula isn't the answer, it is only the means of arriving at the answer. The subtleties, nuances, and variations, are yours and yours alone. Your journey entails a series of revelations to different aspects of the Deity. Your interpretation of those aspects determines your well-being. Your well-being is contingent on you understanding the nature of your existence (why am I here). The reason you are here is to experience God. That you don't like, appreciate, or embrace those aspects of God you are currently experiencing, is an entirely different question than the realization that you are. As to the reasons why you are experiencing what you are, is specific to you--and can't be answered in a post intended for a general audience. However, if you feel as though you need specifics, you can e-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org.