Thursday, February 12, 2015

Bar Hopping

1965 was my last year of Little League. I was 12 years old. During one batting practice I was in center field with a teammate when I heard a CRACK of the bat and saw the ball rising in a prodigious arc over head. I immediately turned and ran towards the point where I thought the ball would come down. (think Willie Mays in Game 1 of the 1954 World Series against Cleveland) Going full tilt with my head turned up to eye the descending ball, I ran under a chin up bar (the three level metal construct of high, medium, and lower bars) and knocked myself out. When I came to my entire team was in a circle around me. It was an interesting phenomenon, looking up at a patch of blue sky with worried faces peering down at me, and having no idea of what had taken place. I don't remember pain so much as being disengaged from reality. The 'here and now' didn't carry any significance. My brain was like a tire on an icy road...I couldn't gain any traction.

Obviously many things had taken place while I was unconscious. 13 kids and 3 coaches had time to run some 250 feet out to where I was. Someone (?) was dispatched to my house to get my mom. By far the most interesting thing that happened, though, was when I was walked (supported on either side) to the parking lot to await my moms arrival. One of the coaches (not sure which one) said; "you're just like your can't pass up a bar." 

To be sure, the comedic genius of the line was lost on me at the time. But distance and memory have enshrined the one-liner as a beautiful insight into human nature. We have the capacity to laugh when danger has passed, or even in some cases, while we are in the midst of it. Further, it isn't necessary for danger to be the essential ingredient. Any of our hopes, dreams, or desires, can be put into proper perspective with a dose of humor.

So it is with my high expectations for January. I have to laugh. I have been here before, nearly two years to the date. (see; Flatline 2-18-13) I wish continued exposure to rejection made it any easier. It doesn't. But there must be a joke in here somewhere. To that end, perhaps a contest? Finish the following premise: A Priest, a Rabbi, and Pat walk into a bar...

(The winner will receive a free copy of the e-book, "The Last Enchanted Forest.")


  1. Uh, I cannot complete your riddle but here's a diddy for you. (I never was good at telling jokes mind you!)

    A man walks into a bar and orders three ice cold beers delivered to a side table. The bartender looks on with interest and does not see anyone join him.

    This happens routinely for several weeks and the bartender can't contain his curiosity any longer. He approaches the man and offers that he could send over the beers separately so that they could be had cold. The man replies that he and his buds used to enjoy a brew together often and for one reason or another they had gone their separate ways. They had all agreed they would reflect with one another whenever in this manner.

    Aaah said the bartender and reflected to himself, what a nice sentimental gesture. This continued, however one day the man walked in and only ordered two beers. With trepidation the bartender asked, is everything okay? Sure why do you ask said the man, suddenly realizing the bartender was referring to the two beers waiting in front of him. Hmmm said the man, I had to give up drinking but my buds haven't.


  2. 1) At least you now know how to post comments. [hooray!] 2) It was a long joke (not a diddy--you are thinking "ditty" which, technically, isn't exactly right either; a ditty being a short song) and I give you high marks for persistence and fortitude. (10 out of 10 on both!) That you took the time and effort to pass along this old chestnut pleases me no end. I appreciate you so very much. I hope you decided this was your "birthday WEEK" rather than just a birthDAY, and have continued to indulge yourself. You are SO worth it. Love, P.